Making Decisions

Making Decisions

2021 Gathering, Part Nine

Curtis: We obviously live and learn through even our wrong decisions, but aren’t there sometimes a lot of signs we miss when making those wrong decisions?

JJ: Right. And this is another point, that not every decision is the best decision. Some people think that everything is God’s will. “Well, it’s God’s will that I marry this Hell’s Angels motorcycle guy, because I think that’s what He wills.” So sometimes we do make decisions that take us backwards, that are not for our best good.

But even with these decisions, we learn from it. Because we always learn through pain. And that’s the only good part about pain is it’s a teacher, and it leads us out of pain. So, we get into pain, and then our lessons lead us out of pain.

We learn from even our bad decisions, even decisions that go contrary to higher guidance. If we’re in connection from our souls, then we will avoid those decisions that take us backwards, that waste time. In other words, certain decisions will waste time, and other decisions will save time.

So if you were guided like Susan toward a certain marriage . . . and the marriage still had problems, that was not a waste of time. There was something in there for her to learn. But, if you marry for the wrong reason, and contrary to your soul, then you will wind up wasting some time.

I met a girl when I was in college that I really liked a lot. I was falling in love with her, but my soul kept telling me, “No, this is not the one for you.” I tried to ignore my soul because I really liked her a lot. And she liked me a lot, and everything was going cool. And I kept getting a ‘no’ answer. I wasn’t even praying or meditating on her. My soul just kept saying, “No, this is not the one for you.” But I said, “no, I want her to be the one for me because I really like her.” (laughter)

And finally, thank God, I was ignoring my soul and pursuing her, and she came to me one day and said, “I prayed about you last night and God told me that I wasn’t supposed to marry you.” And I said, “Well, He’s been trying to tell me that for a while too, but I haven’t been listening.” (laughter) But I said, “You’re right. We like each other but we’re not supposed to be together.” And so we split up right there.”

I’m glad I didn’t marry her. I’m positive now that that guidance was right. It would’ve wasted a lot of time if I would have married this particular gal. I met her about twenty years later in a grocery store. Her appearance was much different and was president of the Relief Society in the Church, and I was out of the Church, so I’m sure it wouldn’t have worked. (laughter)

It’s interesting. When you look over your life, how most of your decisions . . . and this is my belief that most of our decisions in life follow the planning we did before we got here. We plan out our lives, and the people that come into our lives are supposed to come in. And once in a while, we don’t listen, and we make the wrong decision. And when we make the wrong decision, it’ll just feel wrong.

Have you ever made a wrong decision, Rebecca, and it just doesn’t feel right? And then you turn around and make another decision and it just feels good?

Rebecca: Yeah, I have.

JJ: It’s a really good clue that if you’re making the right decision, it’ll just feel right within you. And things will flow better, especially your inner energies. It doesn’t mean everything is going to be smooth around that decision, you may still have difficulties, but it will just feel right.

Any other comments or questions?

Rebecca: Sometimes it’s like you need to make a decision. You need to do something, and there’s just nothing. We have taken the approach – there’s nothing, then do nothing. Or just do something.

JJ: You mean like, sometimes you need to make a decision, and nothing is there?

Rebecca: Yeah.

JJ: Yeah, I’ve had that happen before too. And it’s kind of frustrating. It’s kind of frustrating when every once in a while, you do get a message as to what you’re supposed to do, and it’s clear. And then you come to another crossroads and there’s a blank . . . there’s nothing. Has anyone had that happen too, besides Rebecca?

How about you, Curtis? Have you ever had that? Have you come to a crossroads and there just seems to be like the heavens are silent?

Curtis: Yeah, with women.

JJ: (laughter)

Curtis: You helped me out that one time when I was at a crossroads with this one gal, remember?

JJ: Yeah, yeah.

Curtis: You said it would be a mistake for you to pursue that, and you were right.

JJ: You don’t usually get a revelation on somebody else’s personal life. It’s usually a hundred percent up to them. But one time I did get one on Curtis. He was dating this good-looking gal, and there was no reason for me to get any revelation on the situation, but I got a powerful message that said it would be a total disaster if Curtis were to marry this gal. So I told him that, and he dropped her shortly after that. Do you feel that was the right thing?

Curtis: Yeah, she really didn’t like you.

JJ: (laughter) I did not know that.

Curtis: We’d get together and start talking philosophy and that was distant from her, and she felt a little bit jealous, I think.

JJ: But yeah, I received that really powerfully, which was kind of unusual because you normally just get information on you.

Now a lot of these psychics get information on everybody and most of it’s wrong. But true revelation from the spirit is mainly for yourself, to guide your own life rather than telling everybody else what to do.

But all these gurus are big on telling everybody who to marry, or what to do with their life, or what job to take, because it’s a source of power for them. But normally, you’re supposed to get your own information. But there’s exceptions to everything. And I think that exception with Curtis was because it was really important for him to . . .

Curtis: I would’ve gone down an entirely wrong path. I would’ve been in hell more than I was in that video.

JJ: (laughter)

Phillip: I noticed something. I’ve seen this pattern happen a couple of times. But I had an experience where it was blatantly obvious, and the spirit was just pointing it out to me. And I saw it so clearly.

This person that I knew had gone through a learning phase. And her mind had been expanded, her understanding . . . and she learned all this information, and then all the sudden, she found herself in a position where the people around her were polarized against or for some things that she had been taught. And the spirit . . . her intuition . . . her guidance system . . . everything backed off and she was just left to herself.

And she came to me, and she was asking me, “what’s going on? What do I do with this?” I’m not getting a decision or a direction or inspiration on what is happening, and everyone around me is polarized, and I have to make a decision. I have to go one way or the other. But I don’t know what to do.

And I could just see it so clearly that the revelation and the inspiration I was having was, ‘it doesn’t really matter what decision you make. You have to just make a decision and do the best you can. And until you do that and apply all this information that you just learned . . . it’s like a test phase where you learned all this information and now you have to apply it . . . and then based on the decision you make, will determine what the next lesson is.

“If you make the wrong decision, then we’re going to go back and repeat a bunch of stuff over here that you just learned, so that you can be tested and make the decision again. But if you make the right decision, then you’ll go on to this next lesson. Either way, it’s almost like a testing phase or a period in which it doesn’t matter what you answer, because we’re trying to figure out how well you learned the information, not so much whether you get it right or not.”

JJ: That’s a really good point because sometimes if you reach a point in your life where you’re not getting guidance from the spirit about what to do, it’s because either way it will work. If you do A, you will learn a lesson. If you do B, you will learn a lesson. The point is that you’re also learning how to decide.

So that’s very important, because you don’t need to be guided on every little thing. Like the scripture says, “it’s not meet that you be commanded in all things.” And so, we have to learn to make our own decisions, and we’re left on our own as much as possible. But when we reach a point to where we do all we can do, and then we’re faced with a decision, sometimes, something will come into our inner being and say, “do this. This is what you need to do.” And when you do it, it will just feel right.

And other times, you’ll be in limbo. You don’t know if it’s the right decision. I’ve been there several times. I remember something I considered very important one time, and I thought, “why am I not getting any guidance on this?” I’m getting absolutely zero guidance, and this is very important.     


I believe I did make the right decision. I wouldn’t have met Artie if I hadn’t made this decision. But I made this decision, and I wasn’t sure it was right, but I went with it. And things worked out. Maybe, my higher self thought that was the decision I’d make anyway. So it didn’t need to give me any guidance.

Yeah, Ed?

Ed: Again, all decisions lead to experience. And that’s the way you grow, through experience.

JJ: Sure, sure. We came here for experience. It’s the reason we came to this reality. Because it gives us experience that you can’t have anywhere else. If you lived in a higher sphere where you controlled everything with your mind, you would never enjoy playing golf because you’d hit a hole-in-one every single time. And after you hit about twenty holes-in-one, then you’d get bored playing.

But here in this reality we are limited. A lot of people think being limited is a terrible thing. But think of every game that is played . . . it’s a game of limitations. Take football for example. You have a hundred-yard field, and you are limited to playing in this specific area. You don’t go out of the area to play; you stay in there. So you are limited to those hundred yards. There are twenty-five thousand miles around the earth, but you’re limited to those hundred yards if you’re going to play that game.

And there are all kinds of rules about how the game is played. The game is established by limitations. And we see how well all these guys can perform under these extreme limitations. And it’s fun to watch. And it’s fun to play. It’s so fun to play that they’re willing to risk concussions, and injuries, and back problems, and arthritis and all kinds of negative things because it’s so much fun and exciting that they’re willing to risk everything to play that game.

And that’s the way it is with us and experience. You have an opportunity for experience in this reality that you can’t get anywhere else, and it’s because of limitations. And because of our limitations with spirit, if we can overcome them and get back on the right path and focus and get connected to our inner self and our inner God, then if produces a tremendous win.

And there’s nothing more fun than when you win. And there’s no bigger win that getting in contact with your own soul and your own higher self; and eventually getting control over your own physical body so no one would have power to damage it, thus eliminating all fears. Wouldn’t that be a big win? Getting control of your emotional body so no one can create any fear with any emotional attack. It’s a tremendous win to be able to eliminate all fear from this game that we’re playing.

You look at these people playing football. It’s a dangerous game, but those who play it really well are fearless. They will take all kinds of chances, but they have no fear. They put fear out of their minds, and they play very, very well.

Look at a lot of these things, like a skier. Boy I would be terrified . . . I’ve never been a skier in my life, but I would be terrified in my state trying to ski down a steep hill. It’d scare the dickens out of me. But these guys have mastered it to the point that they can do it, and they have no fear. And they have complete control. And this is way it is with all of our life experiences.

And there is fear that enters into everybody’s life to some degree, that we have to face and overcome. But when it’s overcome, it’s a big win. And it produces an exhilarating feeling that the people in the higher spheres just don’t get a chance to have. But we can get it here. We can have a feeling of accomplishment here that we can’t get anywhere else. And that’s the big draw.

That’s what draws us down to this life that can be a nightmare, but still we’re drawn here. Do you think everybody is forced to come down to this world? No. We actually volunteer.

When Michael Newton regressed people to between lives, he came up with an interesting statement that was made by several people that he received information from . . . that there are a lot more volunteers for difficult lives than there are for easy lives, because you learn a lot more in the difficult lives, even lives with disability, even lives where people are born without limbs or are blind, and such. Difficult lives.

He said there are more volunteers for these difficult lives than these easy lives. As a matter of fact, people begrudgingly take the easy lives because they don’t learn as much. But with a difficult life, you learn a lot.

Like I said, my first marriage . . . I learned a lot even though it was very difficult. I learned quite a bit in that marriage, such that I probably wouldn’t be standing here today if it wasn’t for that marriage. I still might be a good Mormon in the Church. I kept asking, “why? Why do you want me to stay with this woman?” (laughter) And there was no answer, until finally, finally I did get an answer, but it took me a long time to register it.

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