McCall Gathering 2000, Part 8
JJ: Let’s put it this way, any relationship you have should be moving somewhere. If the same thing happens over and over and over and there’s no motion, then the best thing to do is move on to another relationship.
Audience: You suggest moving into another relationship if it’s not moving?
JJ: Yes, unless maybe you’ve been in the relationship fifty years and set in your ways and you’re happy. You can just stand still if you like. If you leave, the other person doesn’t know where to go. The biggest thing that causes instability is the desire for the new and exciting. I’ve had friends before, who can’t seem to be happy in a stable relationship. They find somebody and they’re really excited at first and think, “this person is really nice” and they settle down with this person. Then they wonder, “Where’s the excitement with this person? I want excitement. There’s no excitement anymore, there’s no passion anymore.” And the person begins to look outside the relationship for the passion.
What we need to do once we get beyond the experience level, once you make soul contact and want to provide service for humanity then if you decide you want to enter into a relationship, you have to make that relationship stable. Once it is stable you fulfill the need for new experience not by looking outside the relationship. Now, you are a unit and as a unit you have new experiences together. This is what you have to do because we all have the need for new experiences and the need for new experiences in a relationship is often caused by affairs, causing a lot of pain for the person that you’re with so you can have this new wonderful experience.
The way the disciple does it is to include his partner in the journey and have an experience together and that fulfills the need for new experiences. The need for new experiences is a need that is so great that even when you fall asleep you continue to dream to fill this need. The God that created us all created everything there is because of a need for experience. You, as one of his creations, are having an experience that is unique, different from any other being in the universe. As you are having a unique experience for yourself, different from any other being in the universe is having you are having an experience that is fulfilling natural curiosity. You are having an experience that is one of the dreams of God.
You are a part of God’s life by having an experience unique unto yourself. As we evolve we join others in their experience, instead of looking outside of committed relationship and having experience as an individual. Instead we first include our partner in that experience. Later as molecules are formed we include others in that experience. Businesses and different organizations include many within a group in an experience. As human molecules are formed the experiences will not only be material but spiritual. The realm of experience actually amplifies. The more people that are joined in oneness, the greater the possibility of the experience. That experience will, as molecules are formed, as people unite in greater and greater groups in oneness of purpose, the experiences will be beyond that of what we can experience at this moment in time and space.
Audience: What I’m wondering about is, a stable romantic relationship is there a time on this? If you’re going to do a relationship, that this energy exchange, once it is initiated, does it take a certain amount of time to cycle? Or is it possible to evolve two beings basically, for the most part of our lives we do the solo thing. You can do a relationship that lasts a weekend.
JJ: That type of weekend experience is the thing you do for experience. If you have a one-nighter type thing, you have an exchange of energy and there is some romantic energy that to be involved if you’re human. Unless maybe, if you’re Hugh Hefner. I don’t know if he has any real romantic energy exchange left after sharing with all those playboy bunnies over all these years.
If you have a one-weekend fling with someone, you’re releasing maybe thirty percent of your romantic energy because you know you won’t be letting down many walls. You release small amount of romantic energy and most of that will be the physical energy. The emotional energy will usually be taken back into yourself after the weekend.
Audience: After the weekend fling are you still bonded to this person for days, weeks or months?
JJ: It depends. If it’s intense you may have a memory that lasts years. You could have a ten percent residual five years down the road if it was an intense experience. This could keep you from having a full experience with another person later on.
The goal is to move beyond passing romantic experiences, to keep the good memories, but let the past emotional ties go and concentrate on the relationship at hand.
I found that when you enter a romantic relationship that it takes about three years to stabilize. If you’re involved in a spiritual quest, it is really the wrong time to enter a relationship because, it’s been my experience that it takes about three years to stabilize everything to where you can really center yourself on the things of the soul.
Audience: Is a weekend fling a healthy thing to do?
JJ: Who do you want to have a fling with here?
Audience: Laughter, joking
JJ: We have the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. If you begin the relationship on the physical then it is much more difficult to increase the energy sharing on the higher levels. If you have 100% increase in sharing on the higher levels there has to be 100% trust. If you begin on the physical and you’re easy, so-to-speak, then when you try to move up to these higher levels, then the person will think “if he’s easy with me, what’s he going to do when he’s away from me?” The trust will be difficult to establish so the sharing will have obstacles in the way. Most people when they make love share on the physical level and the physical level is pretty good. There is also making love on the emotional level and the sharing there can be pretty intense. On the plane of the mind, the sharing is even greater there, more refined. On the spiritual level you bring in the soul and you have a trinity of energies being shared.
You notice in the Bible says, “Adam knew Eve and she begot Abel.” It didn’t say Adam had sex with Eve. It says, “Adam “knew” Eve.” Then using this exactly same word the scripture says later on, that “this is the eternal life that ye may ‘know’ God.” To have eternal life you have sex with God. The same word for knowing God that brings eternal life is the same word used for having sex.
Audience: That’s the most different interpretation that I’ve heard in a long time. Laughter.
JJ: Sex is the correspondence of the interplay between spirit and matter. The attractiveness of spirit and matter is the sex between sprit and matter. What we have to learn in sex is to evolve the way we handle sexual energies so it encompasses all four levels. We have the interplay of spirit and matter as we are having the highest form of sex possible. This brings the soul in so you are not only having sex between two people; it’s also sex between Father, Son and Holy Ghost energies. The Trinity enters it. The male is the Father, the female is the Holy Ghost energy and The Son is the soul which is the window to the spirit. It brings the spirit into the relationship. What you want to do is begin the relationship with the highest plane, not the lowest, which is the physical.
This is what happened with Artie and I. When we began our relationship was when I was giving a class. She returned because she was attracted to the spirit of the teachings. Then during one class she merely looked at me and together we felt the spirit together. We thus began with the soul. After the class was over, she came to me and said, “When you spoke to us today, you made love to my mind.” That was the best compliment I ever received in my life. After affecting her spirit and mind the third thing was to stimulate the emotional body, which happened a few days later when I told her I loved her and our emotional bodies really got going. The last step was the physical consummation.
When you make love from the top down, the trust is much easier to establish. When you make love from the bottom up, the trust and the complete honesty and communication is difficult to keep in the relationship. When you start from the bottom up, you can stimulate the emotions in the other, but the 100% of sharing is difficult to establish. You can over a period of time. It is much more difficult than starting from the top down.
First posted July 4, 2004. The Gathering took place June, 2000.
Copyright by J J Dewey
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