Chapter Seventeen
Trust
We have covered the three prime ingredients to a happy relationship: communication, a willingness to give and an open mind. Trust is a fourth consummating key, but the others must lay the foundation for creating this trust. One cannot fully trust someone who deceptively communicates. There will always be the question: “What is (s)he holding back from me now? Is (s)he up to something that is not communicated?” If the mate is an honest communicator, these questions will never be asked and needless suspicions will not be aroused.
If the companion is truly giving, it will tend to make the other feel secure and if a fullness of energy is sent, it will be sensed by the mate and no feeling of betrayal will enter the mind or heart. If individuals do not honestly communicate and become giving, they cannot expect to be fully trusted, yet such a person will demand trust more than others. Trust cannot be delivered on demand, but must be revealed through honest communication.
Essentially trust is a strong reliance on a communicated virtue. We must communicate our strengths and dependability to our mates so they can trust in us.
The most important area of trust in a committed relationship is love. Each wants to trust the other with their love and trust that love will always be returned. To secure this trust, a committed relationship becomes necessary. Thus, the two publicly state before the world in a marriage ceremony that their love for each other can be trusted and a foundation for lasting trust is laid. But if correct communication and giving is not developed, trust will be shaken and the couple will feel insecure in love, which is among the most uneasy of all feelings and very disturbing to the balance in life.
After a couple develop communication and givingness, they find that the cement that holds the union is trust.
Trust in a marriage partner is not unlike faith in God, for trust corresponds to faith and the union sought with a mate is a lower correspondence to our desire for union with God. Before we can have faith in God, we must communicate (prayer, meditation, etc.) and give (donate, serve). Then we find we have faith or trust our concept of God.
Each of us has a reflection of God within themselves, and, when this God in man and woman manifests, a great trusting relationship becomes possible.
If we are to be trusted, we need to be trustworthy. Trust must be also be developed among associates in life outside of the marriage relationship. Groups, states and nations must learn to trust each other and be trustworthy so peace on earth, goodwill to men can be established.
Trust is an energy which is sent that is a reflection of Purpose. Trust which is built on sound principles is very magical. It causes “the law of dominating good” to manifest and sought-for events can miraculously externalize.
Trust is the driving power that moves people to oneness. It is the synthetic energy created through communication and giving.
Trust can only come after effective and honest communication is established. Keep in mind that trust can be wrongfully placed. If the Pharisees had trusted Jesus to teach orthodox doctrine, they would have been wrong. Obviously, such blind trust would show a poor line of communication.
To trust someone, you have to properly understand them. If John trusts that Mary will use her grocery money to buy him a bowling ball, he will probably be mistaken. For trust to have power to cement a relationship, it has to be properly directed. The correct placement of trust is a science just as dealing with electricity is. If electricity makes the proper connection, it may light a bulb. If trust is correctly placed, it may make a reliable union out of two people.
Sometimes, trust will inspire trustworthiness, but not always. Many people just cannot be trusted in certain areas of their lives and showing trust in them will not create an improvement. But for some persons trust can turn their lives around and they will be trustworthy merely because they feel someone believes in them. This type of trustworthiness is usually a temporary thing. Before it can be permanent, one must first be true to themself. When this occurs, others can place faith and trust in us.
A true friend and companion is one to whom you can say: “I trust you, my friend, to always seek that which is good on my behalf and to never intentionally make an effort to cause me pain or harm.”
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